I feel like I have so much to be grateful for since I am married to not just a Soldier, but a phenomenal young leader in the organization. These are my top 7 benefits of being married to someone in the military (some are dual military specific, others aren’t).
# 1 I never have to explain anything – That sounds really lazy. But it is so nice to have a common foundation where we can talk and not have to wonder if the other person truly understands what we are saying.
# 2 I have learned how to be a better leader and person – Having joined lives with someone who is a better leader than myself means that I get the opportunity to grow and learn from someone on a daily basis.
# 3 We appreciate our time together more than non-military couples – What I mean by this is, we don’t like being apart unless it is 100% necessary. When someone has ‘girls night’, I don’t like going because I don’t want to socialize without my husband. Our time apart has already been so much, and we are thankful for every opportunity to be together. It might make people gag, but I don’t care.
# 4 I have learned to let things go – I never get upset about things the way some of my civilian friends do. I don’t have a very dramatic relationship, and part of that is because I know that most things aren’t worth fighting about. Time is too precious to spend it fighting when you are apart.
# 5 I have learned to communicate effectively – When you are separated, you learn to communicate better, because you are limited on time and methods. I believe that if you are at home, and your spouse is away, you should not bring up drama when you communicate. Your spouse most likely is looking for something cheerful and happy to hear about and wants to take their mind off their day. Learning how to be happy and grateful is a great tool and it will make your marriage better.
# 6 My independence has been reinforced – I have always been good at functioning alone. I have enjoyed being married, because we can depend on each other. Since we’ve spent most of our relationship apart, I have also learned that I am still an independent woman that can take care of my life and I didn’t have to lose that part of myself once I got married.
# 7 …But dependence on each other is what makes our relationship tick – My husband and I like knowing we are there for each other, and we have someone to lean on. He also likes to know that I can take care of myself when he is gone, but love having him home even more. I think that too many times, people try to maintain separate lives when they get married. In a military marriage, this can be destructive if you try to continue that when you are together in between deployments. Enjoy each other.
Final Thoughts: There are many benefits for both parties in a military marriage. I believe there is an opportunity for both to learn to be at your best, and it is a choice.
I hope this helps guide you in your marriage whether it is a military marriage or not.