Today, I want to do a bit of a humorous post. I want to talk about the best Army pranks and practical jokes ever. I will be the first to admit that I am not much of a prankster, but I do like a good laugh. During my time in the Army (as a young Soldier), I observed a bunch of different pranks and practical jokes on people such as:
- Sending new Soldiers to the PX to buy chem light batteries
- Sending folks looking for a box of grid squares
- Sending Soldiers in the motor-pool looking for a tube of elbow grease
- Sending Soldiers to the MPs to get a key to the main gate
- When someone got drunk and passed out people would toilet paper their room or drag their bed out into the hallway
- Replaced the sugar in the sugar holder with salt in DFAC
- Added hot sauce to someone’s soda or coffee
- Boat horn in the barracks while someone was sleeping
- Draw on buddy’s face with Sharpie while they were passed out
All of these jokes were funny. No one got hurt and it was a great laugh at the same time. Some people took the joke like a champ, sometimes there were words, and sometimes things got a bit crazy! Payback was almost always worse than the original joke. We never really got out of control or did anything harmful. It was all in good fun.
But, I know that there are some much better pranks and practical jokes than this. I know some of you “funny guys” and “funny girls” have some good practical jokes up your sleeve. Or, you’ve seen a good practical joke. What I’m really looking to do in this post is hear about some of your favorite Army pranks that you have participated in or seen in action.
You can leave a comment below to share your best/favorite prank.
Thanks for reading. I look forward to hearing from you.
Chuck Holmes
Former Army Major (resigned)
Publisher, Part-Time-Commander.com
Email: mrchuckholmes@gmail.com
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I worked on the flight line so we had a few that were played on most new troops.
1. Echo checks: We would have the new guys yell into the intakes to see if there were any cracks in the engines.
2. Rubbing grease pencil on the ear protection. Most guys wouldn't notice for hours.
3. Sending the new guy to supply to get a 1000 ft of flightline. Sometimes they would be sent to other units looking for it.
The main point of these pranks is that they are harmless and nobody is left hanging for too long. There is a point where a joke is no longer a joke. I did not include any I thought were too cruel.
Those are all good jokes. It’s good to have a sense of humor.
I had a couple of good ones pulled on me when I was young Soldier. I was sent to see the Motor Pool NCO for a road wheel pressure tester for a M1A1 Abrams tank. And I was sent to the Commo NCO for a can of squelch spray for the tank radio. Thankfully, the Commo Sergeant was an old Soldier and took pity on me and told me about the grid squares, the key to the main gate and pre-mixed camo paint. Ahhh, the memories!
Funny story, Kevin! Thanks for sharing man.
Okay, the one about sending the soldiers in the motor-pool out to look for a tube of elbow grease was funny. I might use that one in the future.
Some of the others (grid squares and chem light batteries) went right over my head. I guess that I would be a prime candidate for having those practical jokes played on me.
I like the prank of marking on a drunk comrade’s face, but even better, a girlfriend of mine used to paint her husband’s finger and toe nails bright pink if he passed out. Then she would hide the polish remover. He quickly cured himself of staying out all night, drinking with his buddies.
That is really funny Faye. I never painted anyone’s toenails or fingernails, but I should have.
I was MI for the Army. Oxymoron of the military I know. But we ran on zulu time…Greenwich time…and our newbees would be sent out on daylight savings to remind all operators and the mp gate guards to change the clocks. The mps always had mercy…..oh and the other main one…go to supply to get sattelite dusters….we had the big NASA sized ones.